This has been a personal one. Like this isn’t exactly a review since my personal life is intertwined with how I perceived it.
I’ve heard of this book and seen it doing rounds for quite a while. But it wasn’t until a friend put up a screenshot of it that I considered reading it. And I’m glad I said yes to reading it(hehe;).
I found it unique. Like the author decided to focus on a certain decision she made and it lead to life changing decisions that warranted a book. Like I haven’t seen that round. People write memoirs, others write about their careers or lives.. Not specifically about a certain life changing decisions. In simple terms, Shonda Rhymes just did her. You know the way we say , just do you.
And for me that is has been what this book has been about for me. About being myself. Giving myself permission to be authentically me.
She started from a point where she just was. Like sometimes we dim our light and try to adjust to the dimness in the world. We forget our unique characteristics and just blend in with everyone.
And just like her, I’ve realised that it is so easy to blend in and try to be like society. It starts with small everyday decisions, till finally you don’t want to look in the mirror because you can’t recognize the person who looks back to you. One gets used to the emptiness that comes with being everyone else while neglecting being yourself. We all numb it differently, some of us eat, others get addicted to alcohol or porn, others create a persona and convince themselves that it is who they are.
It take courage to go back to yourself. And she did that. You can see her struggles. Her fear of being stunning. When you lose touch with yourself for so long, you just can’t go back and pretend all is well. It takes work. A lot if work. A lot of rectifying, unlearning, leaving, learning. Its like starting to know yourself all over again. And not just knowing but doing.
Like if you know you love travelling, travel, if you love money, look for it, books-read them, singing-sing. Loving yourself moves from thinking about yourself to taking care of yourself. Its not easy, especially after a long time of being everyone else, but your heart will feel at home. And nothing beats, the excitement of doing something that the inner you loves.
While reading this book, I have laughed, I have cried, I have paused and thought, I have let go, I have collected pieces of myself I had distributed in oceans far away. It has continued a conversation I had in my mind about loving myself. This book has greatly enriched that round table discussion in my head.
If you can, say yes. And read it.
Below is my favorite page of this book